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MS CYPRAH

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Member Since: 6/2007Last Seen: 11/27/2009

The Trouble With Racism

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The trouble with racism is that it can be so subtle, unless you are on the receiving end, it is very difficult to appreciate. I was in a Boots chemist in my local town in England one Saturday (something I'll never forget) and someone who looked like the manager was just walking around the shop aimlessly. Suddenly, a white mother and what seemed like her mixed race son walked in. He was smiling, animated, happily chatting with her, obviously going about their business without any problems.

But the sudden change in the manager was stark. He took up a vantage position near the exit where he could see them clearly and he never stopped staring at this young man until he left the shop. I was riveted by the scene in front of me. Anyone else could have stolen the whole shop and he wouldn't care. The only YOUNG BLACK guy was there and, in his eyes, that must have spelt trouble. I thought of my own son and what he had been, and would be, subjected to in his life, merely because of his colour and, for the first time, I felt really vulnerable and frightened for him.

I have always thought that the perfect shop robbery would be done by having one white and one black person carrying it out. They would be so busy tracking the black guy, they would completely miss his partner spiriting away the goods!! I have seen nothing yet in the treatment of black people to change that opinion. In any community you will find all kinds of interest groups, loyalties and affinities, but they are not quite the same as racial groupings simply because we can always change our clubs and associations, but we cannot change our colour or race. We are stuck with it for life, so it cannot be ignored in any argument.

I have been presenting diversity seminars for managers for years and I do the same straw poll of my delegates every time. I ask them what matters to them most in their life. What they believe have shaped them into who they are. While everyone chooses 'family' in the top three items, in almost every case involving women and minorities, the women will put 'gender' at the top and minorities will put 'race' as their top influences.

That is how they believe they are perceived in a multicultural society which has affected their view of themself. A white male might not see race and gender as any issue, but he would be perceiving his life from a position of power within society, the undisputed owner of the historical, social, political, economical, media and professional authority. Until one relinqushes such power to be on the receiving end of prejudiced perceptions, one will never be able to understand this privileged difference.

It's time we developed the confidence to realise that we can have solidarity, brotherly support and the respect we seek without excluding others or treating them in the very ways we ourselves renounce and reject. That only by according love, value and respect to others can we hope to be loved, valued and respected in turn which, hopefully, should reduce racism.

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{"commentId":1355464,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
I have been presenting diversity seminars for managers for years and I do the same straw poll of my delegates every time. I ask them what matters to them most in their life. What they believe have shaped them into who they are. While everyone chooses 'family' in the top three items, in almost every case involving women and minorities, the women will put 'gender' at the top and minorities will put 'race' as their top influences.
{"commentId":1355464,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 2 votes
Reply#1 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 10:24 AM EST
{"commentId":1357005,"authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}

Ms. C

My nieces are bi-racial, they are beautiful people inside and out and you would think in this day and age that people would look past it, but they do not. In Texas, we still get stares and comments at times when we are in public places and it creates questions in their mind, which should not be there.

Thank you, great article.

Mel

{"commentId":1357005,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
  • 4 votes
#1.1 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:32 PM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1355525,"authorDomain":"cliffpotter"}
{"commentId":1355525,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"cliffpotter"}
  • 3 votes
Reply#2 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 10:54 AM EST
{"commentId":1355566,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}

Thanks for that, Cliff. Quite thought-provoking.

{"commentId":1355566,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 1 vote
#2.1 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 11:09 AM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1355581,"authorDomain":"EPH289"}

Ms. CYPRAH

It is almost impossible for me to truly understand how women and minorities feel as a white male in America, and I admit at times I want to dismiss some of their feelings as unfounded although I am probably frequently wrong.

I remember going to college in 1968 and having a black classmate who became a very dear friend. I had grown up in a town of some 5000 people and as I recall there was only one black family in the town. I had almost no understanding of what it meant to be black in America and my naivete showed through clearly. I remember my friend laughing at me when I boldly made the claim that racism was now becoming a thing of the past in America. He gently but with passion told me about what it had been like for him growing up black in the South. Although I didn't buy into everything he said at the time, this began a change in me that is still taking place. He probably has no recollection of this time but it was significant to me. Change of course is taking place, my friend is an accomplished attorney working in a significant position for a white southern US senator. This is something that just wouldn't have been the case in 1968. I praise God for this needed change in our society and our world.

{"commentId":1355581,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"EPH289"}
  • 4 votes
Reply#3 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 11:17 AM EST
{"commentId":1355879,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
I admit at times I want to dismiss some of their feelings as unfounded although I am probably frequently wrong.

I am glad you resist, EPH289, beause a person's perception of their life is unique to them. No one else can experience it in the same way.

Thanks for sharing that. It does give one hope to see the gradual progress being made between the races.

{"commentId":1355879,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 2 votes
#3.1 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:02 PM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1356540,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

This is an excellent piece. I just clipped it to Newsviner's Picks.

I'm reminded of a summer two years ago when I attended a class in Baltimore (a majority black population) and a university that was traditionally black-only. I was the only white guy in my chemistry class and in just about every room I was in, be in cafeteria, bookstore, etc, I was almost always the only white guy.

It gave me as close a glimpse as I can probably get of feeling what it's like to be a minority, what with people stopping conversations as I approached or people all looking at me all suspicious. It was a fascinating experience.

{"commentId":1356540,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
  • 4 votes
Reply#4 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:14 PM EST
{"commentId":1356638,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
It gave me as close a glimpse as I can probably get of feeling what it's like to be a minority, what with people stopping conversations as I approached or people all looking at me all suspicious. It was a fascinating experience.

Thank you for this Scott, because, unless one is in a similar isolated situation they will find it difficult to understand this kind of feeling and exclusion.

{"commentId":1356638,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 3 votes
#4.1 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:52 PM EST
{"commentId":1356883,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

You know the part that freaked me out the most? That the black students were practically competing over who could be my study partner. And I'm thinking, "Ok, I'm in this college because I almost flunked out of this subject but they think I'm smart. Why would they think that? Surely not because of my race. Surely they don't think I'm gonna be smarter because I'm white." After a week or two, when I didn't do well in the class, they lost all interest in working with me.

{"commentId":1356883,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
  • 4 votes
#4.2 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 7:41 PM EST
{"commentId":1357006,"authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}

Scott... you just scared them off with all of that charm of yours... lol.

{"commentId":1357006,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
  • 2 votes
#4.3 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:33 PM EST
{"commentId":1357055,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

That must have been it.

Can I confess my most embarrassing moment of that class?

{"commentId":1357055,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
  • 2 votes
#4.4 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:51 PM EST
{"commentId":1357074,"authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}

Sure, I have shared many an embarrassing moment here on the Vine...

{"commentId":1357074,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
  • 2 votes
#4.5 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:57 PM EST
{"commentId":1357497,"authorDomain":"rkfan"}

Don't leave us hangin', Scoop...

{"commentId":1357497,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"rkfan"}
  • 2 votes
#4.6 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 11:22 PM EST
{"commentId":1357806,"authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}

Logan.. he is making fun of me, one of my last articles read...

"No I did get pregnant" when it should have read "No I did NOT get pregnant" hence examining why editing is so critical ;O)

{"commentId":1357806,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"RebelGirl"}
  • 2 votes
#4.7 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 1:28 AM EST
{"commentId":1359171,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Not only have I shared embarrassing stories I even wrote a story about life as an unlucky klutz. And listed it under recommendations on my bio page.

But this one I've never shared.... so we're in class and I'm thinking about how I once again got lost on the way to class. I was so off at this school that I even had my car towed one day.

Anyway so I'm in class and out of my element and one student is offering to sell prescriptions off a prescription pad that he got god knows where when I hear the teacher mention "today we're all going to go to our hood."

He says "hood" and I think 'hood as in ghetto for neighborhood. And I'm thinking, uh, oh, I'm honkey guy living out of a hotel - I don't have any hood. I'm hood-less. What to do?

Fortunately before I say anything the teacher goes on to explain that there are contraptions in the back of class called hoods where you do something or other with chemicals and the hood helps control the temperature or.. heck, I forget the details - I just know that for a second there I felt like the most racist clueless white boy ever.

{"commentId":1359171,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
  • 2 votes
#4.8 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 3:37 PM EST
{"commentId":1359205,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
I just know that for a second there I felt like the most racist clueless white boy ever.

No, you were not racist. This is so funny, Scott, but a natural reaction when we are out of our own environment. We think in terms of stereotypes based on what we have heard or experienced, until new information changes all that. True racism comes when we have the new information, yet refuse to apply it so that we can continue to think and act in biased terms.

Thanks for sharing. Interesting to see how others feel in such situations.

{"commentId":1359205,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 2 votes
#4.9 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 3:47 PM EST
{"commentId":1360065,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

thanks for saying that.

{"commentId":1360065,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"sbutki"}
  • 2 votes
#4.10 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 9:10 PM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1356841,"authorDomain":"chasing"}
A white male might not see race and gender as any issue, but he would be perceiving his life from a position of power within society, the undisputed owner of the historical, social, political, economical, media and professional authority. Until one relinqushes such power to be on the receiving end of prejudiced perceptions, one will never be able to understand this privileged difference.

This is a good piece, and thank you for it, but once more I have to add the caveat that "White" is a race (for the sake of this argument, anyway) and "male" is a gender, and I'm pretty sure most White males know they're, well, White males. Even ones in position of power are no doubt acutely aware that some people likely think they're there not because of talent, but because of the color of their skin. Perhaps some don't mind that. Perhaps some even revel in it. I don't know - there's all sorts of people in this world, both good and bad.

But I must also again point out that, while I see where you're coming from, and both the US and the UK have societal structures which historically have "White males" at the top - that experience of being in the majority, or powerful, or authoritative, doesn't necessarily hold true for all "White males", even in those countries (well, I won't speak for the UK). But where I'm from, I could have walked a hundred miles in any direction and not seen another "White" person - or, rather, the chances of doing so would have been rather slim, compared to that of seeing one of some other (in that area, dominant) "race".

I also think that as human beings we are capable of empathy. So if you want to say that, generically, "White males" are less likely to be able to truly understand what it means to be a minority, I'd probably say you're right (in the US and UK, at least), most of the time. But some do, because they, though White, are minorities themselves. And the rest can at least empathize, can try to understand, and can therefore try to better both themselves, and society.

In any case, I don't think the notion that one must be in a position of power in order to project "prejudiced perceptions" is necessarily valid, as I categorically reject the notion that minorities, themselves, can't likewise be prejudiced, or that those in "majorities" can't be prejudiced against.

{"commentId":1356841,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"chasing"}
  • 3 votes
Reply#5 - Sat Jan 12, 2008 7:27 PM EST
{"commentId":1358605,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
But some do, because they, though White, are minorities themselves.

Yes, agreed, which is precisely why I used the qualifying word 'might' in relation to them. In the English language that I am used to, 'might' actually indicates that they also might not. It does not mean every White male would. It presents the possibility of some exclusions.

that experience of being in the majority, or powerful, or authoritative, doesn't necessarily hold true for all "White males"

Of course, it doesn't, but because they are disproportionately represented at those levels, they are perceived, per se, by minorities and women to have the power. And perception is the only reality we each have because that's how we see world.

Thank you for your input.

{"commentId":1358605,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 2 votes
#5.1 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 12:03 PM EST
{"commentId":1359674,"authorDomain":"chasing"}
Of course, it doesn't, but because they are disproportionately represented at those levels

Yes, it depends on the "levels" you're talking about - but certainly national policy is dictated by-and-large by white males, this is true, and disheartening (not because they are white males, necessarily, but because one would hope for a more representative government).

{"commentId":1359674,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"chasing"}
  • 3 votes
#5.2 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 6:35 PM EST
{"commentId":1360646,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
but because one would hope for a more representative government

As far as White males are concerned, it is representative. Might not be for anyone else, but they can claim that it is through the well known sociological fact that people tend to recruit in their own image and likeness, the kind who reflects them and makes them feel comfotable, which then perpetuates any inbuilt system bias.

{"commentId":1360646,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 1 vote
#5.3 - Mon Jan 14, 2008 3:00 AM EST
{"commentId":1360759,"authorDomain":"chasing"}
As far as White males are concerned, it is representative.

Well I meant proportionally representative....

{"commentId":1360759,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"chasing"}
  • 2 votes
#5.4 - Mon Jan 14, 2008 4:53 AM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1357603,"authorDomain":"onlynow99"}

Excellent work. Thank you.

{"commentId":1357603,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"onlynow99"}
  • 1 vote
Reply#6 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 12:00 AM EST
{"commentId":1358608,"authorDomain":"mscyprah"}

That's very kind of you to say, Angel C. Thank you too.

{"commentId":1358608,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"mscyprah"}
  • 1 vote
#6.1 - Sun Jan 13, 2008 12:04 PM EST
Reply
{"commentId":1371876,"authorDomain":"appleannie"}
we can always change our clubs and associations, but we cannot change our colour or race. We are stuck with it for life, so it cannot be ignored in any argument.

We had a bi-racial foster child from an incredibly impoverished and high-risk home. Defining herself will never be easy nor has it been. America is no better than the UK, as pointed out above.

{"commentId":1371876,"threadId":"201870","contentId":"1222085","authorDomain":"appleannie"}
  • 2 votes
Reply#7 - Thu Jan 17, 2008 5:15 AM EST
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